


Into the Unknown

by Frejennix, Lalijinx



Series: The Other Side of the Mirror [3]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Light/Dark Sides Switch, Background Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Background Morality | Patton Sanders, Confused Thomas Sanders, Gen, Introducing Robo-Logan, Original Backstory for Canon Characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:07:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24945868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frejennix/pseuds/Frejennix, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lalijinx/pseuds/Lalijinx
Summary: Is anyone else there?I’d like to talk to you.(Episode 3, Arc 1)
Relationships: Deceit | Janus Sanders & Thomas Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders & Thomas Sanders
Series: The Other Side of the Mirror [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1794676
Comments: 30
Kudos: 148





	Into the Unknown

Thomas stared at the open document on his computer, the steady metronome of the blinking cursor like a drumbeat in his head.

This was ridiculous.

He closed his laptop with a snap, pushing it away from him and rubbing the heels of his hands into his eyes, watching the lights explode behind his closed lids. It was _stupid_ , he was being _absurd_.

He had done his cognitive restructuring exercises many times in the weeks since his therapy appointment. He was almost a pro at it by this point. Getting into the headspace to talk to his sides took mere minutes, at most, and he had the dozen word documents to prove it. He should have no issue with calling up his sides.

But…

Something was niggling in the back of his mind. Something important, something that wouldn't leave him alone and stopped him from just calling his core sides like he had dozens of times before. Little tics that his sides had, the way some topics were summarily avoided, and…

And the feeling like Thomas wasn't just made up of Creativity, Instinct, and Self-Preservation.

He felt like there was...more to him.

But he hadn't wanted to bring this up with his core sides, worrying that somehow he would be implying that they weren't enough in some way.

Which was ridiculous, but...not entirely untrue.

Thomas sighed, reaching for his laptop once more. He closed his eyes, falling into the familiar pattern of breathing with ease. He let his mind go blank, letting his head fill with one question, one thought.

_Is anyone else there?_

_I’d like to talk to you._

* * *

_“Do you hear that? He’s calling us again. I_ **_told_ ** _you he would.”_

_“I doubt that he is calling us specifically. I suspect he is issuing a general summons to any of his sides, a category that we obviously fall under.”_

_“What should we do?”_

_“It is unlikely that we will get an opportunity to make contact with Thomas again, once Self Preservation speaks to Thomas. One of us should answer him.”_

_“Okay, but...which one of us? Padre?”_

_“...No. Not me. You should go, Lo.”_

_“Are you sure of your reasoning?”_

_“You’re the best foot forward. If anyone can convince Thomas to see reason, it's you.”_

_“Yeah, L. Padre’s right. You won't let us down.”_

_“That...is correct. I will do everything within my power to bring about the most beneficial outcome.”_

_“I know you’ll try your hardest, no need to say so._ _Metaphorically_ _knock him dead.”_

* * *

“Thomas, what are you doing?”

Thomas tried to ignore the immediate disappointment he felt as he recognized Janus's voice. “Hi, Janus.”

“Thomas.” And Thomas opened his eyes in shock, looking up at Janus who was leaning across the table, a dark look on his face. He sounded mad. “What. Did. You. Do?”

“What do you mean?” Thomas said, wondering why he suddenly felt like he was about to get scolded. “I’m just doing my cognitive-”

“Don't.” Janus held up a hand, as he shook his head, the hard look not leaving his face. “Don't lie to me, Thomas.”

“Wha...I’m not!” Thomas protested, guilt swirling uncomfortably in his gut. “Janus, I would never-”

“You were not ‘just’ doing your therapy homework, Thomas. You put out an open summons.” Janus stared him down, and Thomas felt his confidence and resolve crumbling in the face of Janus’s disappointment.

“...Okay, yes I did.” It came out all in one breath, and Thomas braced for Janus’s reaction. 

A pained look passed over Janus’s face. “Why?”

“I was just…” Thomas fumbled, trying to find the words that would explain the feeling of not having enough, of looking for more, without hurting Janus any more than he already had. “Curious.”

There was a flat silence. Thomas was resisting the urge to dig himself into a deeper hole, even as he wasn’t quite sure why he was digging. After a tense few moments that felt more like an eternity, Janus let out a huge sigh. 

“You can't just put out open summons like that. Anyone can answer them-” Janus sounded resigned, but a jolt of realization ran down Thomas’s spine, and he sat up from his slump.

“Anyone?” Thomas questioned, his confidence returned with the confirmation of his suspicions. “You mean there _are_ other sides besides the core sides?”

Janus made a face like he swallowed an entire lemon. “Yes, _technically_ there are, but…”

“But what?” Thomas was so close to answers, he could feel it. 

“The other sides...they’re not like us, Thomas. They’re different. Darker.”

“They’re what?!” That was _nothing_ like what he was expecting. What did that even _mean?_ “Why wouldn't you tell me that?” 

“I wasn't trying to keep secrets from you.” Janus said, his tone apologetic but firm. “You only just met us, I didn't want to overload you with too much information. I've been avoiding telling you about them because I don't want you to get _upset_ , they’re…” 

Janus trailed off, but before Thomas could say anything he felt a tug in his chest, like a fishhook catching on his ribs and pulling hard. He gasped, his hand pressing at his chest.

“ _Thomas_?!” Janus was suddenly right in front of him, his hand over Thomas's, his voice panicked. “Thomas, what's wrong?”

“It’s...Ow!” He yelped, as the pulling sharpened, and it felt like something broke inside him.

“Thomas, talk to me, tell me what you’re feeling-” Thomas felt Janus freeze, his arm going tight around Thomas's shoulders.

“Oh.”

Thomas looked behind him, startled. Standing just to the left of his staircase was someone...new. 

He still looked like Thomas, albeit a Thomas who had decided earlier in life to become an uptight physics professor, clad in black slacks with a black polo and a dark blue tie. He had blocky square glasses on his face and brightly glowing blue eyes. Those eyes darted all around the room, and Thomas could see the lights in them spinning, illuminating in a circle not entirely unlike a video buffering.

Finally his eyes landed on Thomas himself, and his lips quirked upwards, just slightly. Thomas could feel himself holding his breath as the new side opened his mouth to speak…

And nearly jumped a foot in the air when the side slapped a hand over his own open mouth. For a brief second, the side looked almost scared, and Thomas could see his arm under the polo flexing as the side tried to remove his own hand from his face.

“Don't bother.”

Thomas turned to Janus, shocked to hear his self-preservation’s voice so devoid of warmth. Janus didn't even look at him, his darkened brown eyes on the other side as he held his hand aloft, clenched tight in a fist.

“Leave. Now.” Janus snarled. The other side stood his ground, pulling at his wrist and glaring at Janus. “I said LEAVE.”

The side shook his head, defiant.

“Janus, what are you _doing_ ?” Thomas squawked, alarm coursing through him. Janus was supposed to be warm smiles and dry jokes, not _this!_ “Stop that!”

“It’s alright, Thomas, he’s not hurt.” His words were directed at Thomas but he never took his eyes off the new side, and Thomas was decidedly _not_ reassured. 

“Janus!”

“I have everything under control here, Thomas.” Janus said, and the patronizing way he said that proved to be the last straw for Thomas's patience.

“HEY!” Thomas snapped, frustration and confusion swirling together in his gut and forming something hot and angry. He glared at Janus. “Stop it, whatever you're doing to him.”

“But-” Janus briefly flicked his eyes towards Thomas.

“I called him. You can't get mad at him for doing what I asked, right?” Thomas tried to reason with Janus, ignoring the frustration bubbling up at the way this situation had spiraled so quickly. “That's what you guys are supposed to do.”

“Yes, but-” Janus still couldn’t seem to turn his back on the side, but he was looking at Thomas now. Thomas would take it. 

“So you can't punish him for that.” The new side’s glowing eyes trained on Thomas now, and Thomas tried to pretend it wasn’t a little unnerving. He had an intense stare and the glowing did _not_ help. 

“He should have known better.” The side glanced over at Janus’s statement, something inscrutable in his eyes, before looking back at Thomas.

“How could he?” Thomas softened his voice even more, appealing to Janus’s reason, to his compassion. “Janus, come on. Let him talk.”

Janus stared at him for a moment, emotions unreadable. “You really think this is a good idea, Thomas?”

“Please, Janus.” Thomas said, pleading. _For me,_ he thought.

Janus looked searchingly at Thomas for another moment. Thomas wasn’t sure what he was searching for, but he maintained his conviction. His heart was telling him this was the right thing to do. 

Janus’s jaw tensed. “Fine.” Janus bit out, glaring back at the source of his ire. “But he and I just need to set some ground rules before he can talk to you.” 

The other side met Janus’s scowl levelly, no longer fighting to free himself. He gestured openly with his free hand, looking distinctly unimpressed. 

“You may introduce _yourself_ to Thomas. You will answer Thomas’s questions honestly, but not before I approve them.” Janus narrowed his eyes at him, and Thomas bit his lip at the sudden spike of tension between them. “Attempt to hurt or influence him in a negative way and you’ll regret it. Am I understood?” Janus said, in a tone that suggested he couldn’t care less if the side understood or not, so long as he obeyed.

The other side’s eyes lit up once more, spinning a few times, as if he were a computer program processing the new parameters. After a moment, the brightness faded somewhat, and he nodded once, curtly. Janus grimaced, but lowered his hand, and the other side’s did as well.

“Um...hi?” Thomas said, his earlier confidence fading into incredible awkwardness in the tense room. “Uh...who are you?”

The other side cast one look at Janus before clearing his throat, his hands readjusting the knot of his tie as he looked at Thomas. 

“Salutations, Thomas. It is good to officially speak to you. I am your Intellectual Side. You may refer to me as Logic.”

Janus growled behind Thomas, and the other side flinched when Janus raised his hand to point at him. “What did I _just_ say?”

“What part of my introduction do you find disagreeable, Self-Preservation?” The other side asked, his voice so cool and calmly crisp that Thomas could almost swear he was bored.

“His _logical side_? You’re a lot more than that and you know it.”

The other side, Logic, tilted his head to the side. “But I _am_ Thomas’s logical side.” he said, his monotone voice betraying a touch of confusion. “I represent his logical and rational thinking, as well as short and long term memory, his deductive reasoning-”

“That...that doesn't seem so bad, Janus.” Thomas said, hesitant to contradict Janus, feeling like there must be more that he was missing, some information that he didn't have. 

Some reason why Janus was acting like this.

“You can't take him at face value. He’s neglecting to mention that he’s responsible for a _lot_ more than that.” Janus claimed, crossing his arms.

“That...is not entirely inaccurate.” Logic said, looking vaguely uncomfortable. “I also represent your obsessiveness, your tendency to overthink things, and your...social awkwardness.” Logic adjusted his glasses, an almost pleading look on his face. “However, there are extenuating factors to those functions which I would be happy to explain to you, Thomas-”

“No, I think you’ve introduced yourself plenty, _Logic_ .” Janus turned to Thomas, and his face immediately got kinder, but no less wary. “Thomas? Is there anything you’d like to ask him before he _goes_?”

“I…” 

Thomas was so confused. The way Janus was acting towards this new side was nothing short of _hostile_ , but as far as Thomas was aware, the side hadn't done anything to deserve such ire. Sure, he was responsible for some of Thomas’s least favorite tendencies about himself, but he didn't seem dangerous or dark. Except... 

“What’s up with your eyes?”

Whatever Logic expected Thomas to ask, from the looks of him, it certainly hadn’t been that. “I…” he glanced at Janus, clearing his throat once again. “I do not fully understand your confusion, Thomas. Can you elaborate further?”

“I mean...All my other sides look pretty much like me, although Janus looks a bit older and Hero a bit younger. But they all have brown eyes. I have brown eyes. You…don't?”

“Ah. I understand your question now. It is a simple enough explanation.” He opened his mouth and then closed it, his eyes flashing once. “Am I allowed to educate him on this particular subject, Self-Preservation, or are you going to stop me again?” he asked idly. Thomas could feel Janus bristle behind him, and winced.

“Tread carefully.” Janus growled.

“What is ‘up with my eyes’, as you put it, Thomas, is a manifestation of your subconscious thoughts and feelings.” Janus twitched, but said nothing to the contrary. Thomas glanced over, concerned, but quickly refocused on Logic as he continued explaining. “Your core sides are close to how you see yourself, and their appearances are largely influenced by your own self image. I am not one of your core sides, and thus, my appearance differs from yours in subtle ways. Does that answer your query?”

“I...guess?” It technically did, but Thomas still felt deeply confused. There was still so much being left unsaid, and he wasn’t quite sure how to get answers when he wasn’t even sure what his questions were. “How come I didn't know about you before? Are there more sides that I don't know about?”

“...You will have to ask your Self-Preservation those questions, Thomas, as I am sure he would forbid me from telling you anything I know about your other sides-”

Janus snarled inarticulately, his hand controlling Logic’s once more. “Don't push me, Logic.” He seethed, as Logic’s hand clamped down over his mouth once more, “You’re on thin ice already.”

Logic spoke through his hand, his words muffled. 

“Janus, let him go.” Thomas said firmly, hoping Janus couldn't sense his nerves. Janus did so reluctantly, slowly lowering his hand. He didn’t take his eyes off Logic, his distrust obvious. Thomas ignored it for the moment, specifically making eye contact with Logic. “What did you say?”

“Thomas-” 

Thomas didn’t look over at Janus, talking over his protest. “No, really. What did you say?”

“I said ‘I am not on ice of any thickness, I am in Thomas's living room.’”

Thomas blinked, then let out a strangled sort of laugh. The apparently secretly _hilarious_ side looked at him, puzzled, then gave Thomas the smallest of smiles.

“I think it's well past time for you to go, Logic.” Janus said sourly. He turned to Thomas, face soft, but eyes hard. “Thomas, send him away.”

Thomas was conflicted.

Janus had never steered him wrong in the past. Thomas wanted desperately to trust him, to trust that he had Thomas’s best interests at heart.

But... 

He didn't want to send Logic away.

Thomas had a feeling that he wouldn't be able to convince Janus to change his mind again, no matter how many questions Thomas still had for Logic. And he doubted he would be able to put out another open summons without Janus knowing. 

He didn't _want_ to send Logic away.

But did he have a choice?

“Thomas.” Janus barked, and Thomas lost his nerve.

He hoped that his face conveyed the apology he wasn't able to say out loud. “Thank you, Logic. You can go now.”

Logic nodded once, and then seemed to sink into the ground, vanishing from view a moment later. Janus let out a sign of relief. 

“Thomas, you can't do that again.” Janus turned his stern look on him. Thomas felt a pit settle into his stomach.

“What is the big deal?” Thomas refused to feel like a misbehaving child. He had a right to know. “Aren't they _my_ sides? Can they really hurt me?”

“I…” Janus looked distraught at the thought. “I’m not willing to take that risk.”

“You don't actually know, do you?” Thomas realized, staring at Janus. 

“I know more than you do right now. You have to trust me, I'm only trying to protect you.” Janus sounded almost desperate, and Thomas threw his hands in the air. 

“Protect me from _what_ , Janus? I don't understand-”

“I know that they pose a threat to you. I don't know how, or why, but I know that they’re dangerous. Please, Thomas, you have to be careful. Promise me.” Janus implored, concern shining in his eyes.

“How do you know?” Thomas wasn’t ready to give it up, and knew he had to keep pushing if he wanted answers.

“Thomas-”

“Tell me.”

“You haven't been...we haven't been able to talk to you. We’ve had to get our marching orders from your subconscious. It's my job to listen to the subconscious and figure out what you want us to do. I've been doing it your entire life. It's my purpose, one of my main functions.”

“And?” 

Janus sighed, resignation coloring his voice. “ _And_ a long time ago, your subconscious deemed Logic and...his friends as being too dangerous to live in the mindscape. They were sent away, to a deeper level of your mind where all of their functions could be taken care of subconsciously. Until you opened the door to Logic.” 

Thomas paused in thought, turning over Janus’s words. They were more confirmation that he had additional sides, he was more than just Self-Preservation, Creativity, and Instinct. And now...Logic. But there were obvious differences between his Core sides, and Logic. And probably the others too. Janus claimed they were _dangerous_ to Thomas. Despite that, to Thomas, Logic definitely didn’t feel like a threat. 

“They were sent away for a reason, Thomas.” Janus’s voice was calmer now, reasonable. “There are sides to everyone that they’d prefer not to know about. I'm only trying to protect you. Remember, what you don't know can't hurt you.”

“But-” He got that Janus was trying to protect him, but from parts of himself?

“I have to go. Don't do that again, okay?” Janus looked at him seriously, cutting Thomas off when he opened his mouth to argue more. “Promise me.”

“...Yeah, okay. I promise.”

“Good.” He said, and then he was gone.

A quiet part of Thomas wanted to call him back and argue. Argue that he was wrong, that knowledge itself is neither good nor bad, and that it is humanity’s greatest weapon, and its greatest defense. 

But he didn't, and no one was there to hear it anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> Next episode in one week.


End file.
